This is the plot of Splooshnic Crackers. It is a detailed description of the entirety of the plot, and as such, there are many spoilers!

Forest Island and the Fire Orb[edit | edit source]

The game opens with Splooshnic standing in his house. Bored and alone, he wonders what he should do. Being an industrious treasure hunter, Splooshnic decides that he will go on a journey to find the fabled Element Orbs. Before he finishes elaborating on them, however, he is attacked by a Ninja Warrior, who had disguised himself as a sword. Splooshnic handily dispatches the ninja and goes about his business.

Traveling to the southeast side of his unnamed village (named Oranamo in later games), Splooshnic meets with Random Hermit Man, who warns him that the Ninja Warrior was sent by Evil Wise Man, and informs him of the Cheese Mall plot. Splooshnic dismises the old man's ramblings as insane, until Random Hermit Man mentions that the Element Orbs are central to Evil Wise Man's plot. Suddenly showing interest, Splooshnic is informed that he will find more information in the forest to the south. As Splooshnic exits the town, he is attacked by the Ninja Warrior yet again, who clones himself using the Super Tripple Attack. However, even three Ninja Warriors are insufficient to defeat Splooshnic, and he flees using his Teleport Attack.

Arriving at the forest, Splooshnic meets Random Wise Man for the first time. He is told that the forest is magically sealed, but that there is an instrument hidden in town which can break the seal. Splooshnic heads back to town and enters a cave on the northern end of the village, where he is again accosted by the Ninja Warrior. With little effort, Splooshnic again defeats the Ninja Warrior, who then uses Chaos Control. Traveling into the cave, Splooshnic finds the instrument, but as he attempts to grab it, it shatters. Splooshnic returns to Random Wise Man and tells him of the instrument's fate. Random Wise Man panics, as the destruction of the seal will unleash a great evil, and they are now unsure of how to enter the forest. Arriving just in time, a mysterious man appears from the forest. He claims to be trained in the art of making random music appear from nowhere, and, using this power, plays the melody that breaks the forest's seal. He then vanishes, leaving Splooshnic to explore the forest alone.

Splooshnic travels deep into the forest, battling monsters along the way. Eventually, he comes across a staircase and follows it down, leading to a cave with a staircase leading to the Underworld. There, he finds the Mystic Knight and two Ninja Warriors. He defeats them in battle, retrieving the Fire Orb. The Mystic Knight then flees, promising to remember his defeat. When Splooshnic returns to the surface, Random Wise Man informs him that the Water Orb is being held in Desert Island, to the east. As he does, the mysterious man appears again, informing Splooshnic that there is an underground tunnel system that leads to Desert Island. The forest is again sealed, and Splooshnic returns to his village, where a random rich old man with a really weird house gives him access to the tunnels. Splooshnic heads onward to Desert Island.

Desert Island and the Water Orb[edit | edit source]

Arriving in Desert Town, Splooshnic happens upon a pub filled with monsters. However, as he explores, he is unable to find any sign of the Water Orb in the town, and so leaves to explore the rest of Desert Island. He finds Random Wise Man, who directs him immediately back toward the town. As Splooshnic returns, he runs into the mysterious man, who informs him that Evil Wise Man has invaded, and that he's robbing the town, searching for the Element Orb, with plans to destroy it. Before they can act, the exits to the town are blocked off, trapping them there. The mysterious man says that if he is captured, Evil Wise Man will be able to find the Orb, and thus disguises himself as a Ninja Warrior to evade detection, telling Splooshnic to go after Evil Wise Man.

Searching the town, Splooshnic finds Evil Wise Man in the pub. He reveals that the monster bartender is actually Random Martial Arts Master, who Splooshnic identifies as Random Hermit Man. Evil Wise Man tells Random Martial Arts Master to attack Splooshnic, and they do battle. Splooshnic defeats the old man, releasing him from Evil Wise Man's spell, but then is attacked by Evil Wise Man. In a single blow, Evil Wise Man defeats Splooshnic. Before he can deliver the finishing blow, however, the mysterious man's voice rings out, and Evil Wise Man identifies him as Banz. Banz says that he is on an airship, and beams Splooshnic up, rescuing him from Evil Wise Man. However, they also reveal that the Element Orb is under the pub, and that Evil Wise Man is capable of reaching it without the melody. Splooshnic is beamed back down, and rushes to retrieve the Orb before Evil Wise Man.

As he reaches a tunnel beneath the pub, Splooshnic overhears Evil Wise Man speaking to himself, and hides. Evil Wise Man mentions that he has filled the tunnel with sentry robots from Baconcorp, and that he'll return for the orb after a meeting. Though Splooshnic is nearly sighted by Evil Wise Man, he is just barely overlooked. Splooshnic then sneaks through the tunnel, taking advantage of the sentry robots' limited vision capabilities, finding a staircase to the Underworld. There, Splooshnic meets a robot who appears to be malfunctioning. The robot attacks him, and, after a battle, hands the Water Orb over to Splooshnic. Splooshnic leaves Desert Town feeling confused, and, finding Random Wise Man, returns to the airship.

Snow Island and the Wind Orb[edit | edit source]

Aboard the airship, Splooshnic is informed by Banz that they should seek the next orb on Snow Island. When they arrive, Splooshnic finds a town near an enormous mass of gravestones, as far as the eye can see. In the town, he finds Random Wise Man waiting for him, telling him that the residents of this town seem more aware of the ominous events that are unfolding than the average town. He then leaves, telling Splooshnic that there is another adventurer he must advise. In the pub, Splooshnic finds Banz investigating. He tells Splooshnic that the next orb is somewhere to the east. Leaving the town, Splooshnic heads past the gravestones, coming upon a tower.

In the tower, Splooshnic is stopped by talking rocks, who say that he must prove himself to them before he can obtain the orb. As such, they quiz him on various video games, and attack him with Ice Goblins if he gets a question wrong. He successfully answers a series of Sonic the Hedgehog questions, followed by questions on MOTHER (also known as EarthBound Zero). Correctly answering the questions, Splooshnic ascends upward, to the top of the tower. There, he meets the King of Snow Island. The king agrees to give Splooshnic the orb if he can defeat him in combat. Splooshnic accepts the duel, and the two battle.

Judging Splooshnic as worthy, the king attempts to hand over the orb, but the background music turns ominous, distracting them. As they fear what might happen, a creator says that it was the wrong music, and it switches to the Ninja Warrior's theme, relieving Splooshnic. The ninja, now calling himself the Ultra Ninja Warrior, battles Splooshnic. Though he has grown more powerful, Splooshnic is still able to defeat him, and the ninja flees. The danger passed, the king hands the Wind Orb to Splooshnic, and he returns to the pub in Snow Town, where Banz beams him up to the airship.

The Tank and the Talisman[edit | edit source]

Aboard the airship, Banz muses that even if Splooshnic is able to recover all the Element Orbs, Evil Wise Man's strength is far too powerful, and that they must find a way to counteract his strength. He tells Splooshnic that one of Evil Wise Man's tanks is on a floating ice sheet, and that he should go there next. Once there, the tank begins to flee from Splooshnic, but in spite of its superior speed, Splooshnic is able to corner it and enter the tank.

The inside of the tank is a strange place that looks similar to the Underworld, infested with Spam Spirits. Splooshnic makes his way through the tank, continually accosted by the ghosts, and, after pulling a series of levers, opens up a path to reach the tank's driver. There, he finds Dr. Spamman, who claims that Evil Wise Man is paying him tons of cash to help him. He says that he'll establish the Baconman/Evil Wise Man Co. Cheese-Mall Battlestation, even though he hates Baconman, and attacks Splooshnic. Splooshnic defeats Spamman, and obtains the Spam Talisman.

Meanwhile, Crackers, worried by Splooshnic's growing power, sends a dragon to the Airship, now flying over Carpet Island. When the dragon reaches the airship, he attacks and kidnaps Random Wise Man, taking him to Evil Island. Immediately changing course, the Airship heads for Evil Island, where Splooshnic finds a tower. He descends into it, but is ambushed by Sentry Robots. Just as they are about to kill Splooshnic, Crackers orders them to disperse, and then chase after Splooshnic for his amusement. As he flees, Splooshnic finds a tunnel leading to a lower level of the tower, where Crackers awaits.

After a brief conversation, Crackers informs Splooshnic that he plans on killing him, but before he's able to, Evil Wise Man approaches the room. Crackers panics, and teleports away. However, the teleportation causes Splooshnic to teleport as well, and he finds himself atop a cliff, where Random Wise Man is standing. After they muse about what a mysterious coincidence it is that they arrived in the same place, Random Wise Man says that they should return to the airship, prompting a frustrated Splooshnic to ask him why he couldn't do that before.

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